CRAZY CELEBRITY JOKES

Q: How many times does 12 go into 35?
A: Ask Michael Jackson.

Q: What's 6 + 46 + 5?
A: A threesome with Michael Jackson.

Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year old boyfriends?
A: Because there are twenty of them!

Q: How many Michael Jacksons does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. Michael Jackson only screws little boys!

Q: Why isn't all the controversy bothering Michael?
A: He doesn't mind reaching bottom.

Q: What's soft and brown and sometimes found in little boy's diapers?
A: Michael Jackson's hand!

Q: What's the worst stain to try and remove from little boy's underpants?
A: Michael Jackson's makeup.

Q: What's white and in Michael Jackson's pocket?
A: His other hand.

Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson's toaster?
A: The bread goes in brown, and comes out white.

Q: Who's Michael Jackson's favorite poet?
A: Emily Dick in son.

Q: Why did Michael invite Macaulay Culkin to the house?
A: He's like the little boy he never had.

Q: How did Michael actually proposition the little boy?
A: It was just a slip of the tongue.

Q: What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?
A: Get out of my sun!

Q: What did Michael Jackson yell when he fell off the boat?
A: Throw me the bouy!!

Q: What do you do if Michael Jackson is drowning?
A: Throw him a buoy!

Q: How can you tell if Michael Jackson has company?
A: There's a Big Wheel parked outside his house!

Q: How can you tell when Michael Jackson is giving a party?
A: By all the Big Wheels in his driveway.

Q: How does Michael like to party?
A: He sips a couple of Tall Boys.

Q: What's Michael's favorite snack?
A: Slim Jims.

Q: What's Michael's favorite fast food?
A: Big Boys.

Q: What's Michael's favorite dish?
A: Creamed shrimp.

Q. Did you hear Michael Jackson is moving to PA... Guess which town? A. Dubois.

Q: Why is Michael so tough?
A: He can lick any kid on the block.

Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider a perfect "10"?
A: Two 5 year olds.

Q: Why was Michael Jackson kicked out of the Boy Scouts?
A: He was up to two packs a day.

Q: What do Michael Jackson and Rum have in common?
A: They both come in small tots.

Q: What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?
A: They both come in tots.

Q: What does Michael hand round after dinner?
A: The under Eights.

Q: What does Michael Jackson give his guests after dinner?
A: Instead of after eight mints, he gives them under eight children.

Q: What's black and white and comes in little cans?
A: Michael Jackson.

Q: Hear about the new Michael Jackson doll?
A: It comes in a little can.

Q: Have you seen the new Michael Jackson candy bar?
A: It's white chocolate with no nuts.... (but kids like it)

Q: What's sex like for Michael?
A: Like taking candy from a baby.

Q: What is the worst thing about making love to Michael Jackson?
A: When the crib breaks.

Q: How do you find out Michael Jackson's sperm count?
A: Look it up in Webster's.

Q: Why is Michael Jackson opening a sperm bank?
A: He always has a shitload of semen.

Q: How do we know Michael Jackson isn't really a virgin?
A: He's got children out the ass.

Q: What did Michael Jackson say after he was interrupted during sex?
A: "Shit happens!"

Q: Why does Michael Jackson scream?
A: Because it hurts.

Q: Why does Michael Jackson scream when he touches his nuts?
A: He's sore from the kids last night,

Q: What were Michael Jackson's baby's first words?
A: Which one's mommy?

Q: Why did Michael Jackson dangle his baby over a balcony?
A: Because he overheard his wife asking someone to drop the children off a few stories.